Beautiful smiles captured by the extraordinary Denise, AKA Miss Boho Photography.

The truth of any moment or experience is always a multi-faceted composition, with bright, twinkling sides that make your eyes squint from the glare to darker areas that might not be altogether pleasant to acknowledge.  It is one of life’s most fundamental lessons to learn that our perspective of any experience is what matters most – it is where we focus our attention that determines whether or not we classify certain memories as good, bad, joyful, wonderful or miserable.  It is the glass is half full versus the glass is half empty.  We decide which story we want to believe, and even in situations where the glass might appear almost empty it is still most assuredly in our power to see that glass as overflowing.  It always depends on where we look and how we look at it.

This past weekend was, without any doubt whatsoever, a weekend that did not simply spill over with joy, fun, beauty, creativity and passion, but was a constant bursting forth, like a geyser gone wild.

So let’s just make that clear right off the bat.

But there were other truths that existed during this time, and that continue to be with me as I write this, that, in a weird way, have made this experience that much more poignant, emotional and sacred.  It is hard to explain, so bear with me as I try to express all of this in words, but I shall try.  I was reticent to share anything other than the positive, unsure of whether or not I should shed any light on the parts of this experience that weren’t "happy", but for some reason I feel compelled to speak the truth of all of it, because it is the darker part of this story that make the brighter parts so much more extraordinary for me, which I have found to be true in so many different moments.  Contrast always brings things into sharper perspective, and this case is no exception.

The truth is that this was the biggest, most significant show I have had thus far, and I believe everyone involved considers it a huge success, including me.

The truth is that I have been dealing with this bizarre issue with my throat – supposedly a virus on my lymph nodes – and it has been with me for more than two weeks now.  The truth is that throughout the entire weekend I had a constant headache, I wasn’t sleeping well and my throat felt like it had a shard of glass stuck in in the entire time.  It felt better than the week before when I could barely swallow, but it was basically just a different form of pain and discomfort that never left me.

The truth is that I have organized gatherings, boutiques and retreats with gorgeous, creative soulmates throughout much of my life yet I am still always overwhelmed by the intensity of the connections that occur between myself and these other women, and the connections they find with each other.  These experiences feed me in ways like nothing else can, and it is in these communities that I feel the deepest peace, the most profound contentment with who I am and what I do.  When I get discouraged and lonely and feel the strange allure of wanting to quit being an artist, I do not think of how many paintings I have sold or how many people tell me they love my work in order to get through those moments.  I think of my creative community.  And today as I write this, when I think of all the kind, supportive words these artists have shared with me since the show ended, I weep, because I can’t help but believe I am on the right path if these women are inspired and moved by what I do.  It isn’t about the works of art I create, strangely enough, it is about wanting to celebrate the fact that we are all on this path, trying to make our way as artists.  This can be a difficult, isolated journey, and the moments I’ve made that journey a little less solitary for all of us are the moments I am most proud of.

The truth is that I had a complete emotional meltdown after the show ended, with uncontrollable tears at what felt like were the silliest things, and I don’t think they’re done.  This emotional rollercoaster has nothing to do with anything related to the show, but I believe is more the result of being so mentally occupied by this show and my book proposal before that for so many weeks that the minute more space became available in my psyche, my emotions clamored to get out – and they won.

The truth is that these emotions are coming forth as the result of a deeply personal situation that is breaking my heart, a situation that I will most likely be trying to maneuver my way through for at least a little while longer.  Until it is over, I will be unable to find a certain peace in my heart I have been desperate for for much of my life.

The truth is that I know I will find that peace eventually, and I have to be patient – with the circumstances I cannot control, and with my own wounded self.  The truth is that I can very clearly see the light at the end of the tunnel, and I trust it will be waiting for me no matter how long this part of the journey takes.  The truth is that this makes me breathe a genuine sigh of relief.

The truth is that I think this emotional outpouring is actually good and necessary, but it makes me feel completely schizophrenic, because at the same time I’m a weepy mess, my heart is glowing fiercely from the phenomenal success of every single second of this weekend.

The truth is that a lot of beautiful souls came together this weekend to enjoy and celebrate the work of six extraordinary artists and another blog entry devoted to acknowledging these people is coming soon, but today all I wanted to do is write the truth, every single shred of it.

The truth is that no part of this story is "bad", and the less than completely pleasant parts of it do not, in any way, shape or form, take away from all that is perfect and wonderful and inspiring and gratifying about it.

The truth is that I am honored to have shared this weekend with these women, with my best friend, with my husband and with everyone else who was there, who supported us, who encouraged us and who cheered us on whether they were at the show or many miles away.

The truth is that on the outside I look like a frazzled, blubbering mess, but on the inside I feel light and pure and joyous.  No matter what I do this week – which will most likely be nothing more than mundane errands and tasks – I will be carrying with me the memories of this weekend, the thoughts and thanks everyone has expressed to me since the show ended and the almost painfully sweet recognition that I am an integral part of a community that I admire, adore, love and appreciate in ways that cannot be expressed in words.

The truth is that I feel like the most blessed human being on earth, and that truth is not multi-faceted at all, but a pure, glowing orb that only contains light and glitter and joy.

And the most fundamental truth that fills my heart right now is as simple as it gets:  love.