6"x6" wing series on wood.

Last week I was in a wonderfully frantic creative mode, and while I am still feeling this energy I am going to try to stay out of my studio this weekend.  Although by writing this blog entry I am, in fact, in my studio, where I can’t help but do a few things here and there and oh, hey, do my shelves need re-organizing?

The week before last, when I filled my car with my bicycle, an air mattress and all kinds of other travel gear and emergency snacks, was the beginning of a busy time travel-wise, which has a tendency to put me in the mindset of feeling like I have to Get Everything Done.  This is nothing more than an amped-up version of my normal modus operandi, as I usually feel the need to accomplish any and all tasks swarming around in my brain the instant I get out of bed.  It has actually taken work for me to do things like – gasp – leave the basket of laundry in our bedroom in the morning to do later, rather than take it downstairs first thing to start a load in the washing machine before I’ve even had my coffee, because it is just so darned tempting to be as productive as humanly possible!  I’m going downstairs to have my coffee, why not take the laundry with me?!  Accomplish two tasks at once!  It continues from there if I let it, and before too long I’m eating lunch, answering emails and cleaning my paintbrushes all at once.

I have two commissions to finish before I leave and a show this weekend at Peach Tree Gallery, but beyond that there are no deadlines in front of me.  There are plenty of goals I would like to accomplish work-wise, but the reality of September is that I won’t be here much and would serve myself better to let go of trying to be Superwoman during this time, effective immediately.  The truth is that the work I am doing now is for a much longer-term goal, which is a solo show in 2008, and if I try to rush this process and squeeze these pieces through the tiniest bits of time, I will not be doing my best work and will, in fact, ensure I stay on that treadmill mentality as an artist.  I have gotten myself so entrenched in a feast or famine mindset with regard to studio time because of so many personal distractions (such as moving five times in three years) and I am now having to extricate myself out of its tentacles.  In certain ways this In A Mad Race attitude served me as I’ve been more prolific than ever, but I want this next series to come from a slightly quieter place, or at least a place where I don’t feel like I am racing against some kind of invisible clock.  I want more time to make more mistakes, to push pieces farther than I think I can, screw them up and have to start all over.  I want more time to let pieces sit still in between layers and tell me where to go next.

For a few days last week I was trying to think of ways to get work done and be "productive" while I am traveling, but as this next trip nears that idea is fading ever so gracefully.   I will be able to post blog entries, maybe do some writing and sketching, but that is about it while I am living out of a suitcase.  In the meantime, you’ll still be able to find me in my studio with splatters of paint all over my apron until I have to pack up and fly east next week.  More works in progress on the way…