As the holidays were winding down I had a vision in my mind that I would hit the ground running in my studio as soon as the first rays of sunlight were hitting my easel on January 2nd.  Instead, I found myself struggling to get each day started, and the bulk of my time was spent continuing to get the house back in order and catching up with friends I had not seen since before Christmas.  While this was not a miserable way to spend my days, it wasn’t what I thought I would be doing, and I kept walking around thinking something was wrong with me because I couldn’t seem to be able to stick to what I had deemed were Very Important Plans.  Before too long I was in a bit of a funk and beginning to believe 2008 was already turning out to be the Year of Failure.

Our hearts and minds are capable of wreaking havoc on our well-being when they decide to poise themselves on opposite ends of our emotional spectrums.  My rational self knew it really wasn’t catastrophic that my grand plans weren’t materializing on those first few days of the new year, but my emotional self was resisting all the way, having somehow decided that those days were terribly critical to my success for the rest of the year.  I’m not sure how those three days managed to become so huge and important, but they did without my realizing it, and it took a wee bit of effort for me to come back down to earth.

Now that my bout of irrational drama has passed, I am getting back to work and creating a more solid structure for 2008.  For the first time in a long time, I feel like I can create a long-term vision for myself and my work rather than clinging desperately to whatever opportunities happen to come my way between moves and other personal distractions that have made my work life feel like a random collection of puzzle pieces that belong nowhere in particular.  A lot can be accomplished if life is approached in a haphazard, fly by the seat of your pants kind of way, but what I crave for 2008 is less about zipping through the world like a hummingbird and more about a steadier focus on my highest ideals and priorities.  The excitement I feel for the coming year is more akin to a stronger, steadier flame rather than a series of dynamite blasts at unexpected moments.  I’ve lit the torch, and now it’s time for me to move forward.

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If you haven’t visited my new inspirational blog Sparkletopia, it is up and running full of inspiring morsels.  This week – an interview with the lovely Boho Girl Denise, a review of Takashi Murakami’s current exhibit at MOCA, books, links and an inspiring talk by author Isabel Allende.  Enjoy!